FOOD

Bila org cerita pasal kesedapan sesuatu makanan tu... hmm sebenarnya ia sgt subjective tau. apa yg kita rasa sedap tu belum temtu sedap pada tekak org lain. sama jugak bila kita ckp masakan mak kita sedap, tapi mungkin bg orang lain, tu biasa biasa jek. bercakap pasal masakan mak kita, sebab kita dibesarkan dengan masakan, style mcm tu dari kecik, sebab tu kita rasa masakan ibu lah masakan yg terbaik dan terhebat.

ada satu cerita.. (yg diceritakan balik oleh my biras and my husband)

there was one time, my firstborn, Thaqif went to Wawan's house dgn the father, masa tu dia lapar, dia nak makan nasi, butter and fried egg with kicap. tapi dia taknak atok dia masakkan. dia cakap atok dia masak tak sedap. dia nak mama (me) yg masakkan. so kira nya time tu dia sanggup lah tunggu sampai balik rumah, i masakkan baru lah dia makan. 

what i'm trying to say here is.. mungkin cara masakan tu je yg lain. yg buat kita prefer certain people yg masak. ada org goreng telur, putih dia lembut, ada org buat garing. ada org masak sardin, siap ada bawang, cili, etc. ada org pulak masak sardin terus masuk satu tin mcm tu jek. pokok pangkalnya, sumber/tajuk utama nya tetap sama. 

that's why i don't really eager bila org sibuk dok viral2 kan certain foods. because tekak masing2 x sama penerimaannya. i did try once, ada satu jnis makanan ni org sibuk dok cakap2.. i did try.. but it turned out so-so je to me. since then, i dont really eager, berebut2 nak try. mcm boba2 skrg tgh trend, The Alley la, Di Fu Tang ke jadah apa tah nama dia. so benda2 mcm tu lah.. yes i do (extremely) like benda manis2, kudapan2, dessert2 ni semua. cuma definition of SEDAP to me is different that others. 

p/s: Teh Ais is still my favourite

Khayal

the reason i deactivated my FB account since ada anak ni bcause i rasa nanti i spend too much on it, nanti satu apa pun tak buat.

tapi bila i dah mula active on blogging balik ni, rasa macam2 nak share nak post nak cerita, mcm sama je tahap ketagihan dan kekhayalan ni dgn FB 😄

p/s: thaqif tgh terjerit2 ni ckp x jumpa newspaper sebab i promised him yesterday that today ada activity painting "lion dance" dia.

"POKOK" by Thaqif

On last Wednesday, thaqif came back from school. terjerit2 "mama, saya bawak balik pokok ni", knocking on the door. i was in the toilet masa tu, tertanya2 lah jugak pokok apa pulak yg dia bawak balik ni.

rupanya dia bawak balik "pokok" ni 😄

Day 1 (Wednesday, 18/9 - 5.35pm)

Day 2 (Thursday, 19/9 - 10.57am)

Day 2 (Thursday, 19/9 - 11.54pm)

Day 3 (Friday, 20/9 - 11.11am)

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.

.

masa dia bawak balik tu, he was so excited..

T : mama2, mama safwan kan, dia tolong jagakan pokok dia sampai dah tall sangat.

Me : ok, nanti mama sprinkle kan water, nanti mama jagakan jugak ok

T : yay! tq mama (sambil peluk amma)

being a mother ni kan, kita memang tak boleh kalau mcm anak ckp yg kawan2 dia dpt ni, kwn dia buat itu ini, mula lah kita pun akan cuba sehabis baik fulfill kan apa yg kita rs kita mampu. betul tak?

.

.

.

there was one time lah, kat shopping mall, we passed by Smiggle store (i never keen about this brand before)

"mama2, kejap2, saya nak masuk sini kejap boleh? nak tengok je'

"mama, kawan sy kan, ada ni tau"

perasaan i masa tu, rasa mcm sayu pulak hati ni. dia tak mintak to have that. dia cuma cakap yg kawan dia ada benda tu. tapi hati ibu mcm i ni, i cannot ok. 😢

sebenarnya bukan kita ajar pun anak2 kita utk mcm demanding on certain brands ke apa. tapi sebab tak sampai hati tau dengar bila dia ckp kwn dia ada mcm tu, mcm ni.. entah ek.. susah sikit kot nak explain kalau org yg susah nak faham kenapa kita akan cuba nak fulfill kan apa yg anak kita nak.

ok, lari pulak dari tajuk asal "POKOK". ok bye.

Reborn

rasa nak hidupkan balik blog ni, because i've been blogging since 2009. habis belajar dulu terus dah less active, dah start kerja dan kahwin ada anak terus senyap. but now, rasa nak hidupkan balik. cuma takkan nak buat blog baru. tapi, takkan nak delete pun sebab byk gila posts. so i just leave it as it is lah. eceh, cakap acah2 mcm ramai followers je kan 😂

miss them a little too much today

The Lost

On 26th May 2016, i lost my father. When my secondborn was only 2 months old.

After the lost, my mom's health was deteriorating. she had numbers of surgery. up and down Columbia. Hospital was like our second home. i was there throughout every surgery every treatment. brought along my 3 munchkins up and down JB. stayed with her couple of month after the surgery. went back once a month, twice a month. 

after my father passed away, we managed to persuade mama to do several checkup (mammogram and all). she had this huge lump on her left breast since about 10 years ago but after the lost that actually triggered the pain. as per doctor, this associated with hormone. until she finally said yes for treatments. after first surgery, the lump weigh about 2+kilos. she recovered. took time. but she recovered slowly. not long after, we found out that she had another lump on the same spot. the growth quite aggressive. and oh, she had some kind of ulcer. and the doctor did mention about sarcoma. 

(deep in my heart, i dont want to recall all this.. )

to cut the story short, she passed away on 4th Syawal 2019. 8th June 2019. the same day my sister got married. 

Life is really short. i never regret of any single thing, of having to travel back and forth. i had the chance to cook for her. to bathe her. to spend my time with her. to bring her anywhere she wanted to go. 

if you scroll through my old posts, you would understand how close we were. every single activity we did together. 

May Allah bless their souls

Dee 

11.03.1954 - 26.05.2016

Mama

17.10.1961 - 08.06.2019

Privacy

It's difficult to make people understand this term.

Especially those who are actually too d*** to understand this when they don't apply this in their lives.